Chemo #4: Genetic Mutations, Hair Loss & St. Patrick's Day Tutus

Last Friday, I went through my 4^th round of Chemotherapy. It was a double dose so it was a longer session. My friend, Viviane and sister-in-law Cindy were there to make the time in the infusion center a little more pleasant. Thank you, girls!  Things are going pretty smoothly on Fridays. I am learning the routine and becoming friends with the staff. I also have a plethora of technology with me at all times so I can watch movies, play games (words with friends-hit me up!), Facebook etc. I really don’t know how people survive 6-7 hours of infusion without these things!  They are like the must-haves for all Chemo treatments.  Oh, and the Toms! Can’t forget the Toms!  Comfiest shoes ever.  So, far I am the only one in the infusion center who has them but I think they are going to catch on.

So, through this whole Cancer ordeal I have really tried to remain positive and look at the bright side of every situation. But, let’s be honest, you can only do that to a certain extent.  I mean, of course I feel like this should not be happening to me. How could this be happening to me?  I mean, I have 3 really cute kids, a good career (aside from the pink slip I was given this month), a happy marriage and super cool friends! I always ask Junior, is this really happening? The answer is yes, but he is always very calm and collected and always reminds me of the positive things that will come of this.  He reminds we how lucky we are that we were able to participate in this trial and that we have a phenomenal medical team. We really do. He also reminds me that we are seeing such miraculous results. He’s got a good point there. So, after our conversations, I get back on the happy bandwagon. Thanks, Jun!

Felicitas and Cindy during her treatment

This week, I also spoke to my genetic counselor. She informed me that I have a pretty rare genetic mutation in my BRCA 1 gene. Apparently, I am completely missing an entire allele of the gene. The fact that it has been deleted makes me predisposed to breast and ovarian cancers. I actually had and 87% chance of getting breast cancer and a 44% chance of getting ovarian cancer. So, I guess you could say this was inevitable. Had I known, I could have started the appropriate screenings at 25 years old. So, now when I ask myself why this is happening, I actually know. I know that it was nothing I did. It wasn’t the donuts in the lounge or the Chamango’s (if you don’t know about them, you need to) at lunch.  Now that we know, a lot of people in my family, including my own children, can be tested for the same mutation. Now, I feel good. Like I have helped my family and hopefully because of me, my whole family will be more proactive and have the information they need to take better care of themselves.  The genetic counselor also said that it was more than likely that my mom carried the same mutation, but that it wasn’t until recent years that they were able to test for this specific mutation- the deletion of an allele. This news also changes the course of my surgeries. With this mutation, the chances of reoccurrence are extremely high, so I am guessing that we are looking at a double mastectomy and removal of ovaries. I have not spoken to my surgeon since these results, but I am positive this is the direction in which she will head.

This week I have been feeling a little more sick physically and a little more down in the dumps about the hair loss.  But, I know that this means that the chemotherapy is working and that this is part of my cure.  I have to get through this to get to my cure.  Besides, Nikki at The Lab Salon is taking care of me today.  I told her I just wasn’t ready to go GI Jane, but I was ready for Halle Barry.  We will see.

Viviane and Felicitas at Chemo

On another note, the girls are very excited for St. Patricks day!  The Rayray girls love any excuse for a free dress day. We are working on some very festive tutus for them to sport at their preschool tomorrow. This mama needs to get crackin’.

Thank you for all of your continued love and support, prayers and good thoughts. I cannot tell you how uplifting the cards and notes and packages are.  This week I had my friend Cheli and Karla visit on two separate nights to help with dinner, the kids and give Junior a little break.  Thanks, girls!  We are also very anxiously awaiting the arrival of my godmother, Nana Janet!  She arrives tomorrow and everyone is really excited!